Can I Do This?

I remember logging into my first course in graduate school (it was remote) and feeling so nervous.

My stomach was in knots, my body was trembling, and I could hear that little voice in my head asking, "can I do this?"

You see, even 4 years later, I was healing wounds from my time at Smith College.

Smith was, in a word, a beast. I went from being a big fish in a small pond to a very small fish in a large pond.

In high school, I felt confident, smart, and capable. I was ready to take on the world.

At Smith, I felt lost, stupid, and way behind. I remember sitting in an organic chemistry class, thinking, "why am I here?"

As a first-generation college student, I was unsure of what way to turn or what path I should take.

By chance and by the grace of God, I found Anthropology: the study of humanity and people.

I didn't know it back in 2012 when I declared my major, but I was beginning my journey into finding HR.

My time since Smith has been one of healing, self-reflection, mindset work, and owning my story.

In the past, I'd say, "I wish I had gone somewhere else." Now I say, "I am glad I went there because I do not know who I'd be without it."

Sometimes, our greatest hardships are our greatest teachers.

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